Iss. #33 | Johnny Manziel At the Masters??
You Can Call Him "Johnny Golf Ball" Now
GOLF—HOW HARD CAN IT BE??
Yep, Johnny Manziel revealed this week on Chris Long's podcast (...uh, where now?) that he is giving himself 12 years to make the PGA tour.
From the looks of his swing in the video, his claims of being a 0-1 handicap don't actually seem that farfetched. And honestly, when the timeline for success is 12 years away—who's really going to hold him to it.
In fact, I'm here to formally announce that in 12 years, I plan to buy my own golf course in the greater San Diego area and bring to life my dream of creating a Mario Golf course IRL.
^^ Artist's rendering ^^
BB Reader Intel
I LOVE GOLLLLLLLD
Dated Austin Powers references aside...
This week’s intel comes from Russell D who, after I asked for his Instagram handle to tag, hit me back with “I do not do IG.”
It appears Leronza ("The Art of Bespoke Luxury") offers a 24K gold golf ball and tee for a measly $1113.01 USD.
Upon reading the product description, I was amazed to learn that these 24K gold golf balls and tees are "regularly used by our celebrity and VIP clients when relaxing in Cypress Point and St Andrews."
Google: "Because pure 24K gold isn't alloyed with other metals, it's a soft metal that can bend, warp and scratch easily." Sounds ideal for all their celebrity and VIP clients.
That's a winner. Thanks Russell!
CriBBs: Bay Hill Edition
CHUCK E. CHEESE IS ALL GROWN UP
From above, just your standard Orlando-area 25,000+ square foot compound. Nothing to see here...
Until you learn that the interior designer/architect for this project was none other than Chuck E. Cheese.
Indoor bowling alley, arcade game rooms (plural), indoor basketball court (with a suspiciously low ceiling), poker room, movie theater, massage parlor, indoor spa, sauna, elevator, multiple pools—and sleeps 30.
PGA Tour Superlatives
MOST LIKELY TO... SCREAM "MASHED POTATOES" FROM THE GALLERY
TOP 5 WALKER CUP TEAM PLAYER'S NAMES
USGA announced the 10 man amateur team for this year’s Walker Cup—being held on May 8-9 at Seminole Golf Club.
And in an homage to one of my favorite Tiktok follows: @mike525457 (linked to one of his best—though... language makes it not exactly a mid-workday play), I’m ranking my TOP 5 BEST WALKER CUP PLAYER’S NAMES… LET’SSSSSSSS GO!
#5 - Stewart Hagestad. It's fun to say.
#4 - Quade Cummins. You rarely get to see Q in a first name.
#3 - John Pak. Two syllables. All business.
#2 - Pierceson Coody. Wild spelling of Pierceson—almost Game of Thrones level son of Pierce vibes. And I haven't heard the word Coody since the days of riding in the back of my grade school bus.
And coming in at NUMBER ONE! is Cole Hammer. A name that was born from confidence and a built in "Dropping the Hammer" catchphrase that rivals pretty much anything else out there.
Plucked fresh from our feed...
BADDEST BIRDIE OF THE WEEK
@barryenright45 proving that when we say "Course records will be shattered"—we MEAN course records WILL BE shattered.
Barry's out here knocking down the Sterling Grove Country Club record with a 64 in an OG Cali nonetheless.
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