"I would pay for the privilege to play." - Rory McIlroy offering his rebuke of players wanting to be paid $400,000 to compete in the Ryder Cup... or literally how golf works for the other 99.99% of us.

 

Caitlin Clark living my nightmare 

PRO-AMS ARE DANGEROUS

The viral clip circulating on golf social this week was from The Annika—an aptly named LPGA tournament hosted by... the Annika Sorenstam.
 
Caitlin teed up with an Augusta level gallery extending down the tee box about 25? 50? yards—I didn't play football so sure that seems right. And she pulls one HARD, just a few feet over the heads of the gallery. (Click through the image above for full video.)
 
THEN she has to re-tee and do it all over again—thankfully launching one out there. But yikes is that the stuff of nightmares. Any normal person would likely have worried about that exact scenario as they watched everyone crowded in on the box. But to then have to re-do it with the same gallery just seconds later, I can feel my heart pounding out of my chest as we speak. 9/10 times I'm topping that second ball—FWIW.
 
But also, people, this is a pro-am! No matter who the amateur is, you have to give them some space. Even at pro tournaments I make a point not to be in that hot zone on the off chance they have a brain hiccup and murder me with their ProV.
 
Was crazy to see the coverage of Caitlin too—rumors were they even had live look-ins at her on the range. There are maybe 10? athletes total that could fetch this kind of attention—in a sport they don't even play!

 

Dream Golf is back at it again...

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER MIDDLE OF NOWHERE GOLF DESTINATION

Dream Golf, the golf development company behind Bandon Dunes, Sand Valley and under-construction Rodeo Dunes, is back with an announcement of their newest project: Wild Spring Dunes.
 
Anyone concerned that it would be close to major cities or civilization can rest easy as it's 3 hours outside of Dallas in Eastern Texas. The nearest city on their map is called Nacogdoches, TX—a town that claims to be the oldest in the state and has a catchy slogan "We have a NAC for that." Charming.
 
The plan for the 2400 acre lot is to build two courses (one by Doak and one by Coore & Crenshaw, the people behind Bandon's best), a short course, and a practice facility—as well as home sites and resort. 
 
“This land surprised me. I would never have imagined this kind of property in Texas. The pine forests. The steep ravines. The big hills surrounding it. You walk the site, and it’s always changing, and you can see golf holes on every part of it."
 
Isn't that what Mike Kaiser says about all the Dream Golf courses? Yep. Does it work on me nonetheless? Yep.
 
What a point in life to reach where you can just stroll empty parcels of land, musing on the curvature of the earth, and claiming to see golf holes everywhere.

 

Speaking of strolling parcels of land...

NEW TOURNAMENT FORMAT ALERT!

Golf Monthly introduced me to a new tournament format called Cross Country and it sounds like a blast.
 
The wrinkle to the Cross Country format is that you play the course in a completely different routing. Tee off on the second hole but you're playing to the fifth green instead. 
 
The writer played at a club in Liverpool where two courses intertwined already so it was easy to go from one to the other—and clearly this only works for a private club unless you plan to buy out the entire course for the day. Or you create a nine hole layout using the existing 18 hole track.
 
Either way, it forces you to hit shots you've never seen before on familiar courses. And throw in the rule that you can't use range finders and the entire thing becomes a game of feel.
 
Sure there will be insane holes that were never designed to be played that way, but if part of the thrill is just throwing up your hands and playing the best you can—I dig it as an annual fundraising event or something.
 
Soooooo anyone how actually belongs to a private club want to set this up??

 

We have a winner—let's try this out

A BB"TV" PREMIERE

Last week, I pitched a few ideas for a little content experiment I'm starting at the end of each Breakfast Balls. The idea was to write something inspired by the following news story...
And after plenty of feedback, votes, and a few pitches of your own—we have a winner.
 
COURSE MANAGEMENT
by Bad Birdie Scott (and Chat GPT)
 
Chapter 1
 
Randy Pike had once envisioned a different kind of life for himself, one that did not involve standing in a musty cart barn, cruddy cup of coffee in hand, shuffling side to side to keep warm on this frostbitten morning. It was 5:06 AM and in front of him were exactly 29 less golf carts then had existed the night before.
 
Next to him, Ernie Baxter, the course superintendent, chuckles, "Welp, we're kicking ourselves now for not ponying up for those GPS enabled carts, eh?"
 
Randy breathes deeply, the last thing he needs right now in his life is a joker. "Ernie, the last thing I need in my life right now is a joker."
 
Ernie chuckles again, "You can take Randy out of the cops, but you can't take the cop out of the Randy."
 
Randy closes his eyes, "Jesus, Ernie."
 
Ernie, oblivious (or maybe not) to his effect on Randy, "Twenty nine carts. Not one, not two, not even thirty. Twenty-nine. Peculiar, eh?"
 
Randy sighed and rubbed his temples, he had faced far more "peculiar" challenges—real crimes with real criminals. But here he stood, a security guard for a sleepy country club in Canada. And today, his case was 29 missing golf carts and the closest thing he had to a partner was Ernie.
 
And yet, as much as Randy wanted to shrug it off and return to his ill-fated coffee, something in the pit of his stomach twisted. There was something about the way those carts were simply gone that made this feel off. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but he knew one thing: this was going to be a long day, filled with questions he didn’t want to ask and answers he definitely wouldn’t like.
 
End of Chapter 1

And we have our cover art too!