Iss. #218 | How to Make PGA Tour Friends

Iss. #218 | How to Make PGA Tour Friends

"Four shot penalty." - Harris English joking with Daniel Berger after the wind nudged his ball on the putting green before he marked it... or the inevitable response from the random guy you got paired with after your ball falls off the tee on the tee box before you get a chance to hit.

 

Intel from the anonymous golfer 

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS ON TOUR
Golf Digest runs a newsletter where their writers interview an anonymous Tour player or golf-adjacent figure for the real intel on what it's like to be a professional golfer.
 
This week they shared the secret to making friends on Tour—college football.
 
An insane amount of Tour players either grew up or went to college in SEC country—even more so now that Texas is a member. So it makes sense that one of the hottest topics of bonding and conversations revolve around college football.
 
Bama, Georgia, Vandy, you name it.
 
But the wrinkle I found most interesting is that because many of the top guys take the fall season to rest and recharge, the anonymous golfer said that most of the chatter often centers on the minutae of recruiting instead. 

"These football nuts know more about prospects their schools might sign than I do about my nephews."
 
He even mentions that the international players get into it all as well either because they went to school in the states or just to get invited to the group chat.
 
"I found out I was missing out on text threads and watch parties, which I didn’t mind at first because, hey, I wasn’t a football fan. But those groups ended up taking vacations together and becoming better friends."
 
While the clique-like nature of the Tour is a wrinkle I've always found interesting—this college football allegiance makes me wonder if it could be an incredible sorting mechanism for these side show primetime golf events.
 
If they care THAT much, then why not create the Alma Mater Classic—Spieth and Scottie reppin' Texas burnt orange, Justin Thomas and Nick Dunlap doing their Roll Tide Bama thing, Rahm and Phil for Arizona State, etc. etc.
 
Food for thought.

 

Speaking of the gridiron...

AUGUSTA GETS SOME NEW MEMBERS
"Sources" revealed the latest crop of members at Augusta National this year. Member play officially resumed this week after the summer break and some of the reported damage caused by the hurricanes.
 
Eli Manning, the cover boy above and brother of Augusta member Peyton, headlined the class. He was apparently joined by CBS Sports Chairman Sean McManus, Andy Jassy, the CEO of Amazon, and Ed Bastian, the CEO of Delta Air Lines.
 
The entire membership is rumored to be around 300 and while the CEO of Amazon and the CEO of Georgia-HQ'd Delta Airlines certainly feel like their stature meets the requirements... Eli?
 
Other notable sports-related members are NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred and Braves Chair & CEO Terry McGuirk.
 
And Eli?
 
What am I missing? Is Peyton such a good hang that he was able to grease the wheels for baby bro?
 
I guess I'll stop here because I always get a few emails from you all warning me to not get banned by going too deep. Got to keep my lottery dreams alive.
 
But seriously, Eli??????

 

We never lay up—but maybe we can layover?

DENVER AIRPORT GETS AN UPGRADE
Earlier this year I mentioned how Minneapolis has a golf simulator in the terminal for delayed travelers to sneak a few swings in while they wait.
 
News this week is that Denver will be joining the party with their very own golf sim bar setup called Golf DEN.
 
Located in the Mezzanine of Concourse A, Golf DEN will feature five simulator bays, club rentals and a full bar. And they've cleverly priced a few features that I will legit look into the next time I fly through.
 
5 week seasons for frequent fliers to sneak in a round and compete against all the other George Clooney's of the greater Denver area. (An Up in the Air reference for anyone who remembers that movie.)
 
They also have a Cancellation Club, which includes a full 60-minute session and two alcoholic beverages for $75. 
 
Honestly? I dig it.
The header image on their website, however? Sommmmmeeeeebooodddyyyyyyy was playing with AI image generatorssssssss!
 
I'll say, I've tried many times to ask AI to help create some cool golf images and it can NOT handle people swinging a golf club. There's always something amiss. The club face is pointing in wrong direction, the arms fold weirdly, or they're teeing off with a putter.
 
A... B... C+ for effort at least? 

 

My (potentially) favorite new section of the year

INTRODUCING BB"TV"
For the longtime readers you know that I used to work in entertainment in Los Angeles. TV, specifically. I mostly did PA work, some assistant stuff for TV writers, and even was able to pitch some ideas of my own to NBC. (The pinnacle of my "success")
 
Unsurprisingly—after that impressive array of wins—I decided to pivot into more lucrative industries (aka pretty much any other industry.)
 
That said, I still love TV and storytelling—and I read a true story this week that got my wheels turning...
I mean need I say more? What a f@#^@& headline!
 
The details of this story are that golf courses across Canada were discovering that a few of their golf carts would be stolen at night. And after over 250 had disappeared, Canadian police made a massive discovery in an Ontario raid—

"Including 18 golf carts worth almost $200,000, rare Pokemon and Magic: The Gathering trading cards worth $100,000 and more than two kilograms of cannabis."
 
Now if that's not a killer setup for a TV show, I don't know what is.
 
So my idea is this, I've worked with my co-writer ChatGPT to help craft a few different ways to bring this show to life and need your help to decide which we will choose. I'll share three quick pitches inspired by popular TV shows, you vote on which you like the most, and each week I'll share a quick "episode" of the show in Breakfast Balls. And from there, we'll see where it takes us. 
 
THE PITCHES
 
1) The sophisticated HBO drama—True Detective meets Twin Peaks

A haunted detective dives into the bizarre theft of golf carts in a strange Ontario town. As he unravels secrets buried beneath the fairways, he finds himself questioning reality itself in this eerie, atmospheric thriller.

2) The quirky, feel-good comedy—Ted Lasso meets Parks and Recreation
 
A cheerful golf course manager and a kindhearted detective team up to crack a series of golf cart thefts. With quirky townsfolk, misadventures, and a lot of heart, they discover that teamwork is the ultimate driver.
 
3) The network procedural with a touch of romance—Law and Order meets Grey's Anatomy

Golf cart thefts spark a major investigation that intertwines high-stakes crime solving with the romantic entanglements and personal dramas of the detectives involved. Justice gets personal in every episode.
 
VOTING WILL CONSIST OF EMAILING THE HOT LINE LINK BELOW

- ARE WE LIKING THE CONCEPT?
- WHICH PITCH DO YOU WANT TO SEE? 
- ANY BUILDS OR EPISODE IDEAS?
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