Iss. #182 | Join the Breakfast Balls Invitational Pick 'Em

Iss. #182 | Join the Breakfast Balls Invitational Pick 'Em

Everyone's getting in on the action  

BREAKFAST BALLS INVITATIONAL PICK 'EM

The day has finally arrived—as we speak, a group of readers just like you are battling in the California desert at Rams Hill Golf Club in the inaugural field of the Breakfast Balls Invitational.
 
I say this not to inspire FOMO (okay maybe a dash of FOMO doesn't hurt...), but rather to open the door to you to still get in on the action.
 
The whole purpose of this Invitational was to celebrate you all, the Bad Birdie community. And so it only makes sense to offer each and every reader the opportunity to get in on the winning.
 
So here's what I've got for ya. Classic "Pick 'Em". You pick right, you win. Easy peasy.
 
I'll profile the entire field below with quick intros, some stats, and a fun fact or two to inspire some storylines. Your job? Pick the teams who you think will return the individual low gross, individual low net, and whether or not anyone will activate the "Baddest Birdie" Pot—aka anyone who shoots a gross eagle will earn the full field Bad Birdie gift cards.
 
If you can pick all three correctly, I'll send you a free polo and a hat. 
 
The only catch? Entries only accepted until 10a PST when the final team tees off. So apologies to my late readers but otherwise y'all can just check Instagram and see who won. 
 
(Like when I tried to bet my roommates in college about the outcome of a college basketball game that I had recorded on our DVR. Long story short, that ruse lasted about five minutes until I mistakenly hit pause and they saw it was a full recording...)

BBI Profile #1

TEAM BAD BIRDIE

We've got a spirited side competition called Team BB v. The World. Three of the highest risk/reward holes at Rams Hill are the designated holes wherein if your team's best ball beats our team's best ball... the prizes stack up.

LET'S MEET TEAM BB

Scott - me - 14.8 handicap with a wicked bombing slice off the tee and a short game that somehow keeps me at par or bogey on 90% of holes.

Jason - boss man - 12.6 handicap and while I've only seen him hit one ball in my life, it was an absolutely pured missile at a glow ball event. So one can only assume that is how every shot must look.

Collin - sales guy from Omaha - 2.5 handicap because you know we had bring in the ringer. I love playing dangerously, but some mid teen cappers going toe to toe with a field that includes the US Women's Mid-Am champion... we need some fire power.

Brandon - systems and operations from AZ - 12 handicap who's a maniac for his 4 hybrid. Off the tee, off the fairway, off the fringe. One club to rule them all—and honestly, I don't hate it.

BBI Profile #2

TEAM TINY PUTTERS

The pseudo home team for this event—we've got a squad representing my golf league from Los Angeles.

LET'S MEET TEAM TINY PUTTERS

Austin - head honcho of all things Tiny Putters golf league - 9.9 handicap and UConn grad with a deep passion for college basketball parlays.

Kevin - 8.8 handicap whose designated walk-up song is the NBA on NBC theme music—so we get a glimpse of the kind of sense of ego we're dealing with here.

Alex - 9.2 handicap and music producer who currently holds the Tiny Putters club championship title. The guy can rip it.

Stephen - 9.2 handicap who hacked off his backswing Tony Finau style in the last two years... and subsequently hacked off 6 strokes from the handicap too. A true lesson in swinging your swing.

BBI Profile #3

TEAM ANNIVERSARY

Some stories you can't pass up—and this team had one for the ages. Ohioan, Ryan was looking to surprise his wife Kelly with an invite to the BBI for their tenth wedding anniversary. The problem? Our re-targeting emails sent a reminder to Kelly before we could lock it in... so surprise spoiled but memories made. Sorry, again, Ryan!
 
LET'S MEET TEAM ANNIVERSARY
 
Ryan - 6.0 handicap whose shared two truths and a lie—and I don't want any of them to be lies. Scotty Cameron bought me wine glasses + a decanter, my father-in-law made my putter, and my grandfather built the golf course I grew up on.
 
Kelly - 6.6 handicap whose self-described role in a scramble foursome is "hitting bombs off the tee" and SEPARATELY had submitted an application for the BBI only for me to try to send a fake email saying you weren't selected... before "the incident".
 
Jacob - 5.6 handicap and fellow Ohioan couple friends of Ryan and Kelly. His role on a scramble foursome... sinking bombs. Which either means super long putts or he's so confident in his long game that he can hole out from 200+.
 
Julie - 26 handicap completing the Ohio foursome and wife of Jacob—she's confident in her role as "bartender" for any team golf events. How's your transfusion??

BBI Profile #4

TEAM RUSHMORE

We got Krissy! Currently, only three members sit on the Breakfast Balls Mount Rushmore of BB fans. Russ from Houston with a Bad Birdie logo tattooed on his body, Bruce from Arizona who won the Phoenix Open Pro-Am rocking a pristine BB polo, and the captain of our fourth BBI team and 2022 US Women's Mid-Am champion—Krissy.

LET'S MEET TEAM RUSHMORE

Krissy - +2.6 handicap (duh) and current golf coach for the Oregon women's team. She continues to inspire golfing parents everywhere with a steady content stream of her son hitting balls on the range, delighted to be living his best life on courses across the nation.

Hannah - +1.1 handicap and Krissy's best friend. If I am guessing correctly she's either played golf with George Lopez or flipped a golf cart into a pond. All signs still point to this girl parties.

Mitchell - 11.2 handicap and Krissy's other half. If you've read Breakfast Balls during Krissy's run you'd know that Mitchell was on Krissy's bag in matching BB gear—and completes my #golffamilygoals.

Suzanne - 15.4 handicap, Krissy's mom and ex-Oregon State golfer. Vibes are immaculate as her walk-up song is Stayin' Alive by BeeGees.

BBI Profile #5

TEAM ZIGGY

Biggest question for me about Team Ziggy is the origin story of his nickname because team captain Mike aka Ziggy came in HOT on his application with "this dude is a good hang" energy. Plus, the nickname reminded me of Ziggy Sobotka from The Wire which reminded me how much I love The Wire and sometimes those are the things that move the needle for me.

LET'S MEET TEAM ZIGGY

Ziggy - 7.8 handicap who said he'd walk all the way from Rhode Island to play in the BBI. I respected the drive but was okay for this time if he just flew out with his crew instead.

Will - 16 handicap and self-described "hype guy". In his two truths and a lie he said he applied to be on Holey Moley—and as someone who ALSO applied... casting is a GRIND. But you have to respect the spirit.

Mark - 6 handicap who curiously made his walk-up song silence... or the "Sound of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkel. Simon and Garfunkel is a first tee vibe that I'd be willing to test out.

Kyle - ?? handicap and a true chaos agent, his GHIN didn't return a number so we're either looking at a textbook bagger—or a clerical error...

BBI Profile #6

TEAM DAD DESERVED A BREAK

Patrick played me to a tee with his application where he mentioned being a fellow dad in need of a golf break—and he's a local San Diegan so maybe we'll become best friends after discussing our dinosaur preferences.

LET'S MEET TEAM DAD DESERVED A BREAK

Patrick - 11.2 handicap who describes himself as a team golf cheerleader responsible for classics like "totally gonna birdie this, it's already on the card, making the shot is just a formality." A must-have.

John - 16 handicap whose walk-up music is the Top Gun theme and (potentially) caddied on the LPGA tour. Also a San Diego guy who "keeps the cooler stocked." I think we'll get along just fine.

Larry - 13.4 handicap and may I say, you just don't see Larry's anymore. So points right from the jump there. Hailing from Alabama, Larry's a self-described sniper from 60 yards and in.

Jaime - 7.9 handicap from Canada—we're international now! Wasn't giving me much in the "get to know you" responses, which likely means they mean business.

BBI Profile #7

TEAM WILD CARD

Tragedy struck our final team as illness and injury caused a week-of pivot. The result? A true Wild Card team made of people so insane that they were able to drop everything and head to the middle of nowhere to play. Pick 'Em players beware... care to roll the dice?

LET'S MEET TEAM WILD CARD

Joe - 10.3 handicap and one of the biggest Bad Birdie fans I know. The guy lives half his life out of a camper van, following Burning Man style shows across the desolate California landscapes.

Victor - 8.6 handicap and Hawaiian—embodying everything you'd expect from someone from Hawaii. Genuine, exuberant, and already one of the nicest people I've ever met. Victor is going to be one to watch.

Ben and Aidan - ??? handicaps who locked themselves in for the BBI Thursday morning... I'm FASCINATED to meet these two and remind myself what true flexibility feels like in life.


That's our field, folks!

Click through the button below to submit your picks and be sure to check Instagram for updates. I'll email the winners on Monday!

ENTER THE BBI PICK 'EM

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