You thought the Madden '03 renderings were done?
THE TGL DRIP IS IMMACULATE
Oops—did you think TGL was fresh out of news drips?
Noooo, nooo, so silly!
(Note to current, soon-to-be, and maybe-one-day parents, you know you're watching WAYYY too much Ms. Rachel when your inner monologue follows the cadence above. When is this kid going to start golfing already... And for those asking who Ms. Rachel even is, I envy you.)
But back to the TGL drip—in the past week they dropped not one but two roster updates for their inaugural season and the names are absolutely top shelf.
Drop one, fresh off the Ryder Cup hype, revealed that Shane Lowry, Tommy Fleetwood, Tom Kim and Tyrrell Hatton had joined up. Yet another immaculate piece of timing as the golf world was singularly focused on international talent.
THEN
Wednesday, they "righted" the Ryder wrongs by announcing another three players to the roster: Keegan Bradley, Cameron Young and Sahith Theegala. Two Ryder snubs and a Netflix darling.
So for those not keeping track, here are 19 of the eventual 24 players currently locked in:
Tiger Woods
Rory McIlroy
Jon Rahm
Justin Thomas
Rickie Fowler
Collin Morikawa
Matthew Fitzpatrick
Justin Rose
Xander Schauffele
Max Homa
Adam Scott
Billy Horschel
Rory McIlroy
Jon Rahm
Justin Thomas
Rickie Fowler
Collin Morikawa
Matthew Fitzpatrick
Justin Rose
Xander Schauffele
Max Homa
Adam Scott
Billy Horschel
Tommy Fleetwood
Shane Lowry
Tom Kim
Tyrrell Hatton
Keegan Bradley
Cam Young
Sahith Theegala
Wow.
And you know it wouldn't be a Breakfast Balls segment without a super left field social media find.
"Immaculate drip" is from this guy Jackson Depugh's TikTok. Could not even begin to tell you why I find this guy so magnetic, but the algorithm served him up one day on TikTok and I haven't stopped thinking about him since.
and then for those who need more... Jackson's TikTok
Drive for show... and dough?
HYPE BEASTS BEWARE
163 issues in—and I've officially linked my first-ever Yahoo Finance article! Look at me. (My wife and I have also been watching Billions in the roughly 60 minutes of waking time after dinner and before my eyes start to droop every night. So I fancy myself a bit of a Bobby Axelrod these days.)
This story was absolutely incredible. Trendygolf—a British golf store that specializes in limited-edition drops—got a hold of 144 pairs of the new Nike Jordan 1 low Travis Scotts. A verifiable cornucopia of golf hype beast buzz words.
However, instead of dropping them online as they usually do—opening themselves up for bots to snag them and re-list them on sneaker exchanges at sky-high mark ups—Trendygolf decided to hold a raffle where the lucky winners have to prove they're actually golfers by hitting a drive 200 yards (150 yards for women) on a simulator.
They apparently will be simulating Ryder Cup-like conditions for said driver swings. And each winner only has two tries! Imagining myself in this scenario, I'd have to demand that the 200 yards be measured in total distance traveled rather then straight line to fairway... but I love this idea.
And now I want companies like Scotty Cameron to release a 1/1 of putter that is awarded to whoever can complete some "sword in the stone" style feat. A putter reserved only for the chosen one!
Idk, could be cool.
Roasted GOAT anyone?
BIGGEST Q&A FLEX OF ALL TIME
Social media was ablaze last week as Tiger and Charlie played at the Tiger Woods-redesigned The Hay course in Pebble Beach. Rumors are that he's eyeing the PNC Championship in December for a return. Swings were looking smooth but... Tiger still appears to have a heck of a limp. 😬 Stay positive, Scott. Stay positive.
Anyways, it was all part of a larger junior golf event where an eleven year old named Holden Bautista hit TWO hole in ones—one of which in front of Tiger. Stud.
My favorite part of this story was the footage from the Q&A later that evening. Holden got on the mic to ask one simple question: "Have you ever gotten two hole in ones in one round?"
Cue laughter in the room as Tiger closes his eyes in shame.
But Holden wasn't done. "I mean you're the GOAT and I feel like it would be expected. But it's okay."
AND THEN! My man saves it all by asking a legitimately thoughtful question about how Tiger manages his emotions after particularly emotional shots like epic chip-ins or... hole in ones. (Holes in one? Is this like an Attorneys General thing?)
A true legend. Way to go, Holden.
Also, there is no way Tiger didn't whisper into Charlie's ear later that evening to absolutely bury Holden if he ever came across him in a golf competition.
Your 2024 PGA "Rookies"
CHILDREN OF THE KORN
Last weekend was the Korn Ferry Tour Championship—the final tournament of the season and the last chance for players to make their way into the top 30 and earn their spot on the 2024 PGA Tour.
While I call them "rookies"—many will be making a return trip to the PGA as it's all run like the EPL where the bottom performers on the PGA will drop back into the Korn Ferry each season.
That said, you never know when or where the next big star is going to emerge so I've highlighted a few of my favorites from their PGA Tour profiles.
1) Rico Hoey—grew up in Rancho Cucamonga playing one of my favorite courses in all of SoCal—Goose Creek. For that alone, I'll root for ya. Plus, he's got a nice cheer baked into the last name. <Imagine Rico rips a drive down the center cut> HOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEY that's a nice one, Rico!
2) Ben Silverman. As the article says, "Has an intense dedication to maintaining elite fitness and mental performance." If that made the bio then you HAVE to know that Ben ain't touching a single carb. And for that reason, we have our villain.
3) The Coody Boys. Pierceson and Parker—born 37 minutes apart—are fraternal twins and third generation PGA golfers. Their grandfather wons The Masters in 1971! Got to imagine they struggled in grade school though with kids saying "ew, here comes Coodys" or something.
4) Chandler Phillips. "In alliance with his impeccable mustache, "Tombstone" is far and away his favorite movie of all time." Nuff said there. I'm in.
5) Norman Xiong. "At age 5, finished runner-up to Sahith Theegala in the 6-and-under Division of the 2004 World Junior Golf Championship at Torrey Pines. Grew up primarily in San Diego, California." My first reaction was to say, dang, I should go to more kid's tournaments if this is the kind of players out there. And then I remembered I played in a tournament once as a kid. Topped the ball on hole one. Topped my follow up. Then sliced my third shot into the opposite fairway. I will not be attending any children's tournaments.
6) Joe Highsmith. "Claims he is better at pickleball than he is at golf." Top notch shade being thrown by the writer here with the use of "claims".
7) Rafael Campos. "He once caught a 386-pound blue marlin that took him two and a half hours to reel in." Still waiting for someone to explain why fishing is fun.
Your 2024 LPGA "Rookies"
PRINT IT, SHIP IT
Epson Tour unfortunately didn't give me the kind of puns I was hoping for—but they're a printer company soooo thus the headline.
Moving along, just as the Korn Ferry finished its season last week, so did the Epson Tour—awarding 10 new Tour cards for the upcoming LPGA season.
While the newcomers (or their PR people) didn't give me quite the same kind of "enjoys grilling steaks on his Green Egg" insights that the PGA did—I still wanted to shout out a few notable rookies entering the fray.
1) Gabriela Ruffels. An Australian who recorded five top-10s and finished 15 on the money list in her rookie season... only to miss the registration deadline? There's got to be a story there. -550 odds it was a clerical error. But I'm seeing +1250 on the board for a Hangover-like series of unfortunate events that led to her getting to the registration office just minutes after it closed.
2) Auston Kim. Auston played collegiately at Vanderbilt and her sister is currently a med student at Vandy—and MY sister graduated with her PhD from there too. So I've got to support the 'Dores. Plus, love hearing about the family support—"My mom has been on the bag all year. My dad, my coach has been there 24/7." What a grind but well deserved.
3) Agathe Laisne. A French-born player with a stat that really demonstrates the kind of passion these players must have for the game—in 2022 she only made three cuts, earning $2,924 total for the season. Less than $3k TOTAL. But she fought back this season to earn $109,060 and now, her LPGA Tour card. Also, Agatha wins for most relatable way to start a quote, "I have a little headache, but I feel very pumped." Amen, sister.
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